When I heard the word “rage”, I used to immediately think “violence”.

Aggression. Destruction. Out of control. Unreasonable. Not okay.

....

That day, nothing was working my way. After a few hours of growing rage, I called up a friend. Weirdly enough, he was experiencing the same situation! After a solid fifteen minutes of serious complaining on both side, I asked him “What do you do with the anger when nothing seems to be working?”. He said: “I use my anger to do the next thing”.

Taking our own emotions seriously is not only an act of self-respect, but also a political one. It is about accepting what arises as part of us, learning to give it its rightful place back, to potentialize its information and energy into creativity, inspiration and transformation.

Rage was almost totally displaced from my life for almost all of my life. And for sure the conscious and ‘not-gremlin’ one. As I was growing up in Poland, this bizarre country in the middle of Europe in ’90s, I didn’t know anybody who could have taught me how to feel, express and use my anger in a safe way.

Have you ever felt stuck because you had the feeling that you had to do something in a way someone else wanted you to?

Why do you need anger to create fulfilling relationships? You might want say that anger destroys relationships and I would agree: too much unconscious anger can do that. And in the same way, too little conscious anger can keep you from really being in relationship.

My earliest memories about anger go back to when I was around 4 years old. My mother and my father are fighting with each other. I do not understand why they hurt each other with words. I want them to stop. Why do people fight like this? Shortly after they separated.

La plupart du temps, j’essaie d’ignorer ou d’engourdir ma colère et de me convaincre que cela fonctionne. À la place, je veux plaire tout le monde et, en cachette, j’accumule en moi des non-dits sans être consciente. Oui, je le vois : je me mens concernant ma relation avec la colère. Alors, pourquoi je me suis inscrite à ce cours, maudite marde ?

Ich benutze Wut um diesen Artikel zu schreiben. Ich benutze Wut um mir die Nase zu putzen. Ich benutze Wut wenn ich etwas ändern will, in Beziehungen für Klarheit sorge und den Redefluss von Klienten in meinen Sitzungen unterbreche, um mit ihnen einen Schritt weiter zu kommen.

ABOUT LIFE IN SLAVERY AND LONGING FOR FREEDOM

I would prefer that everything I write here would be not true.

I’d rather be able to open a Facebook chart and pretend that it’s all cool and helping others pretend it’s cool.

(And although this does not exclude the wonderfulness of life) it is not cool...

& 12 other tales of Reclaiming Authority

On the fifth day of a temporary magic school, it became obvious that the soil in the magicians and sourceresses had been prepared enough for their Dragons to sprout and flame-up the world with a certain kind of poetry. I was one of the Dragon Speakers. Here what I as my Dragon said.

Ich komme aus einem Umfeld in dem mir beigebracht wurde, dass Gefühle nicht OK sind. Es super ist, wenn man gefühlsmäßig taub ist. Eine hohe Taubheitsschwelle hat. Das heißt, wenn mich jemand angreift, verletzt oder beleidigt so zu tun als würde es mich nicht berühren.

When I tell my friends that I’m doing Anger Practice or Rage Club Spaceholder training, a part of me cringes and shrinks. Not wanting to toot my own horn, draw attention to myself or make people uncomfortable. Rage Club? That sounds intriguing comes the response at times.

Have you ever been so filled with rage that you don't know how you could ever express its fullness? You feel the rage bubbling up into all aspects of your physicality; shaking, clenching teeth, fists, and stamping feet? Do you wonder how you could be filled with so much emotion – questioning; 'what's wrong with me!?'

Der Entschluss mich nun tatsächlich hinzusetzen und diesen Artikel zu schreiben fiel in dem Moment, in dem ich wütend wurde. In dem ich die Wut in mir aufsteigen spürte. Wut darüber, dass ich immer noch nicht schreibe.