A frying pan is a space, in which high amount of transformational heat is generated. The heat that is needed to burn through your illusions, projections, phantasy worlds, stories, constructs and concepts of who you are and who the person sitting accross from you is.

A Frying Pan is not an Emotional Healing Process coaching session.

It is not a couple's therapy session.

It is not a mediation.

It is not a trial.

This heat is generated by three factors:

1. Heat from the circle sitting at the edge of the frying pan.

If you are sitting in the surrounding circle you job is to pe present. Your attention is key to the extent of Transformation, Healing and Love that can happen in the centre of the frying pan. You sit there, centred, grounded and in your personal bubble of space. You may get to whiitness the shift from Low Drama into High Drama. The act of taking radical responsibility for Emotional Reactivity, Assumptions, Expectations and Resentment. It would be naive, to think you are sitting in the audience, untouched by what you see and hear. Sitting in the circumference of the frying pan is also being in the frying pan. This place is also hot. You will start feeling something. Your box will have reactions. And there is a chance that your being will be fed so much by whitnessing, what else is possible in human relating, that it will come more forward and your box will start to enter a liquid state. This is, why frying pans work best when they are used in a group context. The people in the centre of the frying pan go first and by transforming their personal stuckness in relating they open this possibility for the whole community.

2. Your decision

Being in the centre of a frying pan starts with you deciding to go into the middle and claim your spot. This is a courageous act that takes enough conscious Rage to decide that you have had enough of what you already know and can on can not create in relating and are willing to burn down, what is fake, unreal, your show, your defences, your rigidity your righteousness, your lies, your adaptivity, the list goes on. No one can go into the centre of a frying pan for you. And, more interestingly no one can stop you from going into the centre of a frying pan.

3 Heat from the clarity, distinctions and unhookability of the spaceholders

Holding space for a frying pan is like sitting in the focal point of a glass lens where the sunrays start frizzling you. There is no way to hold space for a frying pan from any of your boxes concepts or ideas or plans or your Gremlins wish to be successful, or your Gremlins addiction to harmony or your Child-Ego State's needs for approval or being seen. It will all be burned. The only thing you can radical rely on as a frying pan spaceholder is your own path, your set of Bright Principles, your Archetypal Lineage, your transformed Gremlin at your side, your attention, your unhookability, your purpose sniffer and your bullshit detector.

This is, why it makes sense that two spaceholders collaborate in holding space for a frying pan.

The form

At the centre of the frying pan are four chairs. The spaceholders sitting in two of them, facing each other. The other two chairs, also facing each other are empty.

There are three ways of claiming a spot in the frying pan:

1. You go into the middle, sit on one of the vacant chairs and ask a specific person from the circle if they are willing to sit opposite from you.

2. You go into the middle, sit on one of the vacant chairs and declare that you are willing to go through any process of clarification that anyone may have a need for with you right now.

3. A person from the surrounding circle uses one of their three powers and asks two people, they sense as 'stuck' in any way to go into the frying pan together.

The beginning

Before anything else, the spaceholders shake hands with each participant in the centre of the frying pan. And also the two participants shake hands. This may look like a formality or even some kind of religious ritual. It is not. This is however a chance to connect in Archetypal Love with each other and have a five body experience of a being to being connection with the people standing here with you at the edge of Modern Cultures concepts of war, separation, win-loose games, and create something completely different.

The middle

The end

When is the frying pan over?

When is it enough for now?

Is there anything else that needs to be said right now?

In the end, again the space comes to an end with handshakes. This is a door for expressing the gratitude of what was possible and connecting from adult to adult, even if the boxes are liquid and the emotional bodies may be still feeling Emotions. It is also a signal for the physical and energetic body that this space is closing now. Also for the circle around the frying pan this step creates a clear end, which is needed, before something new begins.